Sunday, May 29, 2016

Sublimating my sexual energy into something else

ive been trying to get rid of my sex addiction by doing meditation but I realize practicing mind control is only one half of the solution but not enough. I've for to find another outlet for the energy inside me that's at the moment expressing itself as sexual desire. This comes from the development over many, many years of a deeply satisfying sexual relationship with Fred in which I explored my wildest sexual fantasies and found out my true sexual nature. However, I'm now a married woman with a baby, and I have to move on to the next phase of my life. The other half of the solution is to channel and divert my inner energies into something else. I wasn't as horny when I was working a full time job and even less when the baby came, but now that I'm a full time housewife, I'm completely relaxed and  well rested and my mind to turns naturally to sex. I look at the men I meet each day and occasionally I get attracted. If they are charming and witty, who knows what will happen. The Devil finds work for idle hands they say. He also finds cocks for idle cunts. I have to be on my guard to prevent the situation going out of my self control like with my yoga instructor.

Maybe I should go back to work. Or do something from home which is more flexible and suitable for a mother. I'm looking at all these online work from home schemes to see if I earn something doing online work from home. With baby asleep half the day, and with a maid doing all the housework, I've lots of free time and my mind will drift. I'm now going through all the work at home internet sites to see what I can do......

13 comments:

  1. U cant change who u r. Just accept it

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  2. Really? How do you know? I've been meditating three times a day and I've not masturbated nor watched porn for a while. I feel very restless but maybe once I get over the difficult initial hill, it will be easier and downhill after that?

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  3. your experience with the yoga teacher was SO damn sexy. I don't mean you should cheat but I think most guys find a girl who is so sexually aroused she is slowly seduced and slowly her reluctance gives way to all out fucking is the epitome of a truly sexual woman. are there anymore experiences like that in your past? what are some of the fantasies you have when you masturbate? Fantasising about cheating is not cheating, right? What is the furthest you'd go short of cheating? Phone sex with an old boyfriend or some stranger? Or more...

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    1. My husband isn't like that. I have to impressed by the guy before I'll consider sex. But once I'm interested, I like the man to take me and I find satisfaction when I surrender completely to his desires. I know a few women who are like me too, and I could tell you some of their stories as well.
      The good thing about Fred was that since he didn't want to leave his family, he encouraged me to date other men and I would even tell him about my sex with these other men. He's still a platonic friend in need.
      While We were lovers, he was often not available because of his family, so in my free time, I had sometimes gone online and it always escalates from Internet to email to phone chats to nude photos(without face) and then if the guy is decent looking and witty, to meeting up. I've done anonymous phone sex too and it always leads to me wanting more so I know I can't control myself. So I don't do phone sex anymore. I get so aroused, I've even had real sex with unattractive men whom I would never have given a chance otherwise. It's just that all the dirty talk makes me want to do it so I'll get persuaded to meet up in the end.

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    2. I rather chat online first and meet up for dates before progressing sexually but I'm ok with just Internet sex without video or photo or chatting. Now that I'm married , I don't meet up.
      I don't think fantasizing about sex with strangers is cheating as long as I don't meet up with the person but phone sex with a person is at the border of cheating and in my case often leads to real cheating
      Trouble is I've got a very high sex drive and if I keep thinking and talking and writing about sex, I will be sorely tempted to cheat.

      I'll write some of my masturbatory fantasies when I'm in full control of my sexual desires. Right now, I'm partly a cunt. The organ between my legs controls my mind and heart. I'll fall in love with whoever gives me great orgasms but I have a husband and a son.....

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  4. is this now or before marriage?

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  5. did u do this while your married?

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    1. It's because I'm still faithful that I am writing my lusty thoughts online. If I had started an affair and am getting lots of action, I'll be too busy getting fucked to write.

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  6. I haven't had sex with anyone but Tom since we got married. Not even since we went steady. Maybe only at the beginning of my relationship with Tom when I wasn't sure about him.
    I have managed to keep myself faithful to him so far .....I run away before temptation gets too strong to resist.

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  7. what are your friends stories?

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    1. I'll tell some of my friends sexual adventures another day.

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