Hi! It's been two whole weeks and I've been faithful to Tom. I've not masturbated at all and during the one time I had sex with Tom, I used my mind control to stop my sexual fantasies, and focus on Tom and on the physical details of our sex. It wasn't great sex and I didnt cum but I managed to keep my mind 95% free of thoughts of Fred or Ariff or Kumar or starhub technicians etc.
I do my yoga at home sometimes with the help of youtube and a few times a week I jog to the neighborhood park and do some exercises before returning home. This seems to help me let off steam and excess energy that met be channeled into lusty thoughts. I bring baby out for a walk every day and the walks are longer and I talk to him non stop.
I mediate. When Tim is asleep, I sit cross legged and with my hands on the knees in a lotus position, and I focus on my breathing. I count my breaths to a hundred and keep my mind as blank as I can. Whenever any thoughts come into my mind, I stop it and refocus on my breathing. I can't do this lying down as I will fall asleep and I think people who suffer from insomnia should try this. It's not easy to keep my mind blank and if I lapse it will be several minutes before I realize I have been thinking. I'm developing a mental muscle to stop thinking of things I don't want to think about. When I surf the net, I stop myself from straying into sex and porn sites as I will not be able to control myself.
Most of all, I stopped masturbating. If I masturbate, I will think of myself fucking somebody I know in a certain place. If the situation arises, this increases my chance of wanting to really have sex with them. All my masturbation will lead eventually to a sexual tryst with somebody, I know. It won't happen because I look for it, but if someone attractive comes at me, especially someone form my past, I won't be able to resist and I'll be easily seduced. The happiness of three people, me, My husband Tom, and baby Tim will be gone.
If I succeed , I will not be posting here again. Writing this blog has helped me express my sexual frustrations and relieve them, but it's not as good or as effective as completely suppressing my sexuality. Recalling my old sexual trysts only makes me want to do it again.
If I manage to break free from the chains of my sex crazed body, I will still come back and post to say it and my blog will continue without much sex in it.
Wish me luck!
I do my yoga at home sometimes with the help of youtube and a few times a week I jog to the neighborhood park and do some exercises before returning home. This seems to help me let off steam and excess energy that met be channeled into lusty thoughts. I bring baby out for a walk every day and the walks are longer and I talk to him non stop.
I mediate. When Tim is asleep, I sit cross legged and with my hands on the knees in a lotus position, and I focus on my breathing. I count my breaths to a hundred and keep my mind as blank as I can. Whenever any thoughts come into my mind, I stop it and refocus on my breathing. I can't do this lying down as I will fall asleep and I think people who suffer from insomnia should try this. It's not easy to keep my mind blank and if I lapse it will be several minutes before I realize I have been thinking. I'm developing a mental muscle to stop thinking of things I don't want to think about. When I surf the net, I stop myself from straying into sex and porn sites as I will not be able to control myself.
Most of all, I stopped masturbating. If I masturbate, I will think of myself fucking somebody I know in a certain place. If the situation arises, this increases my chance of wanting to really have sex with them. All my masturbation will lead eventually to a sexual tryst with somebody, I know. It won't happen because I look for it, but if someone attractive comes at me, especially someone form my past, I won't be able to resist and I'll be easily seduced. The happiness of three people, me, My husband Tom, and baby Tim will be gone.
If I succeed , I will not be posting here again. Writing this blog has helped me express my sexual frustrations and relieve them, but it's not as good or as effective as completely suppressing my sexuality. Recalling my old sexual trysts only makes me want to do it again.
If I manage to break free from the chains of my sex crazed body, I will still come back and post to say it and my blog will continue without much sex in it.
Wish me luck!
:(( all the best
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