I'm excited by raw sex without love

Yes, Fred and I realized I get turned on by raw sex without love. One of our favorite foreplay dirty talking is to for him to say he just wants to fuck my sexy body alone, and that he doesn't care for me at all. This would make a lot of women angry and turn them off sex but for me, it has the opposite effect. I get aroused by the idea that my man is so superior to me that he can take and conquer me sexually without having to say nice things to me..

Fred likes to make me feel like his sex slave by drawing on my body. He would write words "slut " and "whore " or "Fred's sex slave" or "I worship Fred's cock" over my buttocks and breasts and my groin and  I'm not allowed to erase them. Wearing these words on my body the whole day made me very horny for him. Sometimes he would draw a cock and balls on my breast or my buttock. Once he even drew one between my breasts and made me wear a low cut dress. It was so embarrassing and yet so stimulating.

 Ill always remember one memorable day in Bali on one of our many trips abroad. We rented a  beautiful villa high up on a slope overlooking the beach. There was a private pool and a an open pavilion with two massage beds overlooking the ocean. Once we had settled down and unpacked, Fred sent the villa attendants off so we were all alone with privacy and yet open to the sky and sea. Fred grabbed me in the living room and we were kissing and tongueing and his hands were all over me, grabbing my buttocks and breasts. Soon I was completely stripped by him and we were both lying naked except for my high heels on the carpet  in the middle of the living room floor. He tied my hands behind my back which I love. He took up a fine permanent marker and started drawing and writing on my breasts. Soon both my breasts were covered with sexy writings and erotic  drawings like "I fucked Fred in Bali " or "this body belongs to Fred" and there were drawings like kamasutra, of a man and a woman in all positions. There were even a couple of drawings of a woman being fucked by three men, and drawings of a woman tied up. The drawings went to my belly and to my buttocks. Fred is a good drawer and By the time he was done, I was like a bitch in heat.

He took out my vibrator penis Mr Blue and put it deep inside my vagina secured it with strings around my neck. He also tied my breasts with rope so they  bulged forwards and looked bigger. That turns me on. Then he applied nipple clamps to my nipples. When he turned on the vibrating dildo, i was so excited, I started to gyrate and twist my bidy and moan in pleasure. He  started to bite me all over leaving love bites all over my neck and upper chest. And both breasts were also covered with love bites. So was my belly and my buttocks. I was so excited, within ten minutes I groaned "Im
going to cum!.." He stopped immediately and switched off Mr Blue,  and made me kneel up to suck
his cock which I did with gusto hungrily and with slurping sounds and saliva drooling down my lips. My hand was still tied behind my back so I couldn't use my hands but I coudknt get enough of his cock so I started to do strokes like mouth fucking, withdrawing until only the tip is in my mouth and swirling my tongue around the groove under his glans head, and the sliding my lips round his shaft until I was as deep as I could and then withdrawing back, up and down. When he started to stiffen and his balls began to contract, I withdrew and stopped.

He pulled the rope round my neck to drag me off my knees to my feet so we were standing very closely face to face and looking at each other's eyes breathless with lust and pleasure for a long minute. "How do you want me?" he began his usual domination talk which he had written for us . " I want every inch of you deep inside me, in my mouth, in my cunt, and in my anus...." I began my declaration of total submission to him, something that's what I feel is the ultimate in sex, " I want you with my heart and soul and from the depths of my cunt. I want you to penetrate me deeply, possess my body completely and fuck me until I lose myself totally with no hope of rescue."

"Beg me if you want me" he commanded. "Please let me be the one who has the privilege of being your sex slave and whore today. Please use my mind and body to pleasure yourself. Let me have the
great honor of having your cock in my body" I recited the words which made his cock harden and twitch against my belly and which also made me ooze cunt juice.

"Do you love me?" I asked. " No! I only want to use you and your body for my sexual pleasure only  as long as you interest me. When you no longer excite me, I will leave you." My nipples erected with this answer. I Can't help being aroused by a man who only wants me for sex. "You are to make yourself into my dream sex toy and doll as much as you can." I replied, " yes Fred, my love for you is free and comes with no strings attached. I love it when you are so manly and so strong, you can make cunts like me do anything you want. I need you inside me, between my legs. Please fuck me hard now. Take me. Use me. Cum inside me."

"Pleasure me first, " he commanded. Fred sat down in the sofa with a grand view of the ocean throug the French windows. He untied my hands and Mr Blue from my cunt. I knelt by his side me and started sucking his cock head and pumping his shaft. He put his hands behind my buttocks and started stroking my slit and clit. When I saw his cock stiffen and his balls rhythm change I would stop and knead the head of his cock firmly with my thumb to discourage his cumming. But before he relaxed I would start licking and sucking and pumping his shaft again. Whe I almost ready to cum, I would grunt and moan, and he would stop fingering my cunt.

After an hour of keeping both of us on the plateau of the edge of almost cumming but not yet, Fred said, " I'll cum now." I doubled my licking and sucking and nibbling of his cock and pumoed his shaft hard with my delicate hands. Soon he was arching his back and tensing his whole body. "Take my sperm!" He cried out as he came in my mouth. I took his cock out to spray his cum all over my face because Fred likes it. Then I looked at him as I showed him I swallowing his cum and licked my lips for cum several times. Then, without wiping the cum off my face, I leaned back on the sofa and started masturbatung myself. Fred whipped out his camera to video me. I grabbed Mr Blue and switched him on I and pumped my vagina with it, pressing the base against my clitoris, until I came with little moans and groans with grimacing for the benefit of Fred who likes to watch me masturbate and watch my face as I cum.

Sexual imprinting

Why do I like sex so much and why do I like abusive submissive rough sex with men who don't care for me? I figured it was because of all the porn vcds my father left behind after he deserted us for another woman. He didn't support us at all, and with my mum working two jobs, I was a latchkey child left to myself, and his legacy to me is a mind filled with the images of huge cocks pumping into lips and cunts and the women enjoying it. I feel what turns me on in sex is decided by the ideas that my parents and my upbringing when I was a child. And since I had practically no parental advice, all I had were the stash of porn videos, magazines, and blue books from my father. I was sexually imprinted at a vulnerable age by porn.

The good thing for me is that I actually enjoy doing what my lovers want from me, and I've had a very satisfying sex life as far as the sex is concerned. I actually hear the men comparing me favorably with their wives or girlfriends as I would do much more for them. After learning the ropes with my first boyfriend, I've had lots of compliments and very few complaints on my performance as a lover. In fact, I pay close attention to what my lovers want, and I'm always trying to get better at my bedroom techniques as well as acting provocatively. I'm try to get better at saying  what my lovers want to hear.

It is the time out of bed that is not good because I get attracted to men who just want to use me for sex and to feed their ego. I am sexually attracted to all the wrong men and I can't help it. I'm much more turned on by men who lust for me sexually and hunt me as a sexual prey, than by men who respect me too much and are content holding my hand. Even my husband Tom telling me he loves me during sex is sweet, but doesn't get me going. I get very wet when my man is pulling my hair and pumping me roughly from behind and asking me to "move your ass, you cunt!"after which I would gyrate my ass more.  I respect such a man more somehow, maybe because he doesn't need my love, and maybe I have an inferiority complex, feeling that because he is so high above me, I am not good enough to deserve his love anyway, I should be very honored just to have him being willing to fuck me. I remember once asking Fred, " do you love me Fred?" Inside his boutique, on our love sofa. We had closed the shop, and we were seated facing each other with my hand pumping his cock, and his
hand in my clit while we kissed. "I love the way you fuck" was his reply. "But do you love me as a person?" I asked. " I love the way you can completely surrender yourself to me when I'm screwing you" he said. " Do you love me when we aren't having sex?" I persisted. " I love you much more when my cock is inside you!" Fred teased. He could feel me getting wetter as he was finger fucking me, and knew I liked his answers. "Don't talk of love" he said, " I just like fucking your brains out." His answers made me so horny, I mounted him on the sofa and placed his hands on my breasts as I murmured, " yes, please fuck my brains out!" I was oozing fluid all over his groin and I had an womderfully intense orgasm. After that, Fred knew I like pure sex rather than love and that I really enjoyed his dirty talking during sex. It's terrible but for me, sex is much better with men who only want sex from me. I think subconsciously, I feel that I'm not good enough to be loved, and don't expect my lovers to love me. In fact if they respected me too much, maybe they weren't good enough for me. i get turned on by men who think of me as a bimbo to impress for an easy fuck.

Sometimes I just want to spend time together as a couple doing ordinary things but I don't get much of it after my first boyfriend John. It was sex and sex and sex until Tom came around. He liked watching movies and holding hands and even shopping with me. I didn't enjoy sex with him but until we planned to get married I was still getting some wild sex in the side. Sigh, I can't seem to get the best of both love and sex.

Park bench sex with stranger

We continued to stand close together like lovers with his arms on my waist and his groin pressed against my back, and my hands still pressed back against his thighs . After he came, he became soft but I was still burning with desire from two weeks of tittilation by Fred and now this, so I didn't pull away despite being in public. "Can you walk me home ?" I heard myself saying,"it's dark and dangerous and I'm afraid to walk through the park alone."  I turned my head and look at him as I said this. "Yes, sure, of course I will," he replied.  So when my stop came, I grabbed his hand and pulled him along. I didn't want to chat, I just wanted to finish off the adventure. We took the feeder bus and sat at the back together. I didn't talk, I put my hand round his neck and starting kissing him on the lips. We frenched until we reached the park. Actually,my house was one stop before the park, but I needed an excuse to walk through the park which was not well lit at night and very dark at certain places. I took his hand and led him straight to my favorite park bench. There were no lights overhead, and it was among the darkest spots in the park. It was at this very same special park bench where I
had lost my viriginity a decade ago, where I had led Randy, the taxi driver, for a revenge fuck, where

I first had sex with Fred etc.

This special place near my home makes me relaxed and helps me get into the mood for sex. If someone is a potential, i often bring him here and start there. We sat down side by side and I continued our kissing. He had one hand round my waist and one on my breast. I felt his cock, it was still soft but stirred a bit. I massaged hsi cock through his trousers. He put his hands under my blouse and removed my bra. He pulled my blouse up and starting kissing and sucking my breast and nipples whilst he kneaded the other nipple with his fingers. I arched my back with desire and moaned with pleasure. He got harder when he saw the glazed lust in my eyes. I pulled his shorts and underwear down and started rubbing his the shaft of his cock up and down. He was now erect and almost hard. I bent down next to him and starting licking and sucking the tip of his cock whilst I pumped his shaft up and down with my hand. I'm short, so he could reach around my butt, and started to finger fuck my very wet cunt. I sucked and pumped him until he was rock hard and ready.

He made me stop and sit up. He kissed me whilst his hand went between my legs and he played and rubbed my clitoris. Like every other man, he was too rough. I guess my clitoris is much more sensitive than other women's. I didn't say anything but I took his hand and guided his finger to my clitoris and showed him the delicate gentle rotary movements that I like. I let him kiss and masturbate me until I was almost coming. I was still pumping his shaft to keep it hard.

When I was ready, I stood up on my three inch heels, and sat down on his hard cock with my back to him. I put my manicured fingers on his bare thighs, and gyrating my ass slowly on the glans of penis, angled his cock smoothly into my cunt. I went down all the way to the hilt with a sigh of pleasure, and using my heeled legs and supported by my hands upon his thighs, I started to pump myself up and down the length of hsi cock. Standing until almost the full length is out and the sitting down all the way. He pinched one nipple with one hand and rubbed my clit with the other, so within five
minutes of vigorous strokes, I was ready to cum, but I wanted to prolong the pleasure so I stopped to change position. I turned around and knelt over him on the park bench with my arms over his shoulders and the sat down on his cock. He out his hands under my buttocks and help me lift off as well as massage my shapely ass at the same time. He kissed and sucked my nipples. It was so good, I started to moan and pump faster whilst I arched my back to push my breasts forwards towards his mouth. He started to take little bites of my flesh, and slap and pinch my buttocks. "Yes! That's nice" I whispered , so he started to bite and pinch me harder. The sensation of pain combined with the pleasure of the rubbing of his  thick hard cock along the rim and walls of my cunt, and the stretching and rubbing of my clitoris combined to give me an exquisite whole body pleasure sensation that resulted in a total and complete body wracking orgasm that went on for a few minutes. I couldn't help arching and moaning with pleasure.

After I came, he made me kneel on the bench with my elbows on the back of the bench whilst he stood up and fucked me from behind, doggy style until he came again. We sat down exhausted on the bench for several minutes before we started to cover up our nudity. He walked me back to the ground floor of my apartment but I didn't want him to come up. I was feeling very cheap and slutty and low class and shy. I thanked him for a most wonderful experience, and said I hope we could do it again. He passed me his card. He is a computer technician for both software and hardware.i told him I may need help with soft and hard problems, and whether I could use him. He said anytime......

                                   Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

So when my husband Tom gently rubbed against my butt in bed an I started gyrating against his cock, I couldn't help thinking and reliving that most memorable and sextifying one night stand with a stranger on a train and in a park. I confess that I was partly fucking him again in my mind, and partly fucking Tom, as my mind switched between fucking two different men.

End.

Train sex

Continued from previous post...

Well, I didn't call the police. I just kept quiet and still, but with my heart was pounding excitedly. I let this strange man rub his cock up and down my ass. Maybe it's because I was so horny because of Fred or maybe because I'm just a slut who can't control herself.

The man, when he realized I wasn't going to resist, got bolder and his pelvic thrusts became harder and longer. I know I shouldn't but I started to feel aroused and couldn't deny that the feel of his body was pleasurable. I enjoyed the feel his hairy thighs rubbing against the back of my thighs. I slowly stopped arching my body away from him. I allowed the train to rock me against him and didn't resist. In fact, I pretended that I couldn't control the swaying and rocking of the train and allowed more movement against his cock. I slowly, imperceptibly, began to slight gyrate my hips a bit and stick my ass out a little. After a while, I think he knew he had me because when the train jerked and I stumbled  on my three inch heels, his hands came up to support me at my waist. But he didn't let go of my waist after I was stabilized. I flicked my hair over my eyes and turned my head back to him to see what he looked like and I looked up at him through my long lashes and smiled shyly , "Thank you."  "You're welcome" he said in a ddeep manly voice that got me thrilled. " It's difficult to stand steady on my high heels," I complained , wanting to hear the voice of the cock that was plying my ass. "It's my pleasure to support you." He replied as he pulledthe back of my skirt up a bit so my bare butt was in contact with his shorts. With his hands on my waist and hips, he could now support me and pull me into his cock. I stepped my legs apart and bent forward a bit to give him access, and he bent down a bit and came up under me so I could feel the tip of his cock against my cunt lips. I turned back again to face him as he ground away at me, "hi!"  I smiled . I just needed to see his face, I didn't just want to have a faceless fuck. He smiled at me and we locked eyes as he pumped me. He pulled his shorts down with one hand, while I draped my skirt over him to hide him. Now I could feel his bare cock against my cunt lips. It wasn't possible to enter me without angling until people noticed so after a few tries, he contented himself with rubbing my labia with his cock. I was soaking wet and couldn't act coy anymore so I put my hands down to feel the front of his thighs as he pumped me. I looked back often to smile at him, and kept eye contact with himwhen he finally came with hot gushes of semen all over my g string, my skirt and down the inside of my thighs. He had that grimace and tense look of pleasure that I like to see on the face of the man when he's cumming.

He pulled up his shorts but now he had his hand between us and he was rubbing my slit from behind although he couldn't reach my clitoris. " I am getting off at the next stop" he said sadly. "Oh! So soon" I slipped. I wondered why he had to get off at the next stop. Why couldn't we stay longer. " I get off in another three stops," I replied breathlessly as he was rubbing me to ecstasy. " I'll stay with you till the end then." he understood me. Many people got off at his stop, so he had to take his hand away from me quickly, but we still stood close together like lovers, with his hands on my waist and his softening cock against my butt....

To be continued 

What goes through your mind when you are having sex?

Ive just had sex with Tom, my husband, and I asked him."what are you thinking of when we are having sex?"  He replied, " nothing much, I don't think. I just feel and react." When I press him, he says, " I feel your soft smooth skin, i see your beautiful body, your breasts, your buttocks, yes, I feel the pleasurable sensation of your vagina tight around my cock. I like you holding on to my body and pulling me closer or deeper. I like the soft sounds you make. I especially like the feel of my semen as it gushes through my urethra when i ejaculate. I don't know what else you want." "What did you think of just now when we are having sex" He asks. "Oh nothing, just like you I guess. Feeling, seeing and hearing the sensations of sex." I lied, even though I did have an orgasm.

Tom is so healthy mentally. When he makes love with me, he's there with me, one hundred percent. He's so simple and so direct and focused on what he is doing. I'm so different. We were both lying on our sides in bed, cuddled up spoon fashion, with my back to his front. He was tired after a long day, but I was fresh and  I was hoping to get some action from him. I was wearing my thin nightie without any underwear. I lie to him that I do it to prevent thrush but sometimes I do it to seduce him. I wriggle my back towards him a few times as though adjusting to a more comfortable position. I was really just grinding my butt against his cock, which happily became erect and hard. He stirred, aroused, so I wriggled a few more times innocently. He began to thrust his cock up and down my butt cleft, and I began to gyrate my butt. I could feel his warmth through my thin nightie and his thin boxers. Soon I felt Tom lift my nightgown up and the sensation became much more pleasurable when. I could feel the heat and the rubbery texture of his cock directly in contact against the skin of my buttocks. He had pulled his boxers down to expose his cock.

The swinging up and down rhythm of his pelvic thrusts against my ass reminded me of a torrid train ride on the MRT (mass rapid transit or subway) many years ago......when my lover Fred was training me to express my sexuality completely. He would make me go without orgasms for several sex sessions until I was begging him for sexual release. I wasn't allowed to masturbate to release my urges during these training periods. He would order me to dress very sexily to work and display myself in either low cut blouses or short skirts.

When I was very young, I had watched a lot of porn, and one theme that got to me was anonymous sex on the Japanese trains and subways. The scenes were too daring to be real and I never thought they could happen, but somehow, I don't know why, I found them arousing. Maybe it's because I took
so many boring train journeys. Anyway, as Tom plowed into me, his rhythm made me recall about a sexual adventure that happened because Fred was deliberately leaving me sexually frustrated and making me wear revealing clothing. I was on a tightly packed train during rush hour and everyone
was crushed together. There was no way I could move away from a man who was forced into my
back. I was wearing a miniskirt of a very thin material and a g string. The man behind me must have been wearing shorts of a thin material too because I could feel his cock pressing against my ass. It was pointed downwards but the swinging and rocking of the train meant that i couldn't prevent my butt from rubbing his cock back and forth,  and side to side. As he got erect, the cock began to poke forward into me firmly but I coudnt move an inch away from him. For a moment, I felt his hand against my buttocks but then his hand move away. Now I could feel that he had pulled his cock upright. It must have been painful for him.

I could feel his cock very well. I could tell that it was quite large and very, very hard. And I could feel the heat. And it fitted right into the groove between my buttocks. I could smell his manly smell close in. A sweaty but not unpleasant smell. After a while, maybe because I made no attempt to move away, on top of the side to side , and the back and forth rocking of the train, i detected a slight but definite up and down movement. He was thrusting his cock against me! So shocking! How dare he? Surely everyone will notice? I looked around me left and right but no one was looking, I had a brief
glimpse at his face, he was ok looking, Chinese, and of average build. In that one second, with my head turned and my eyes looking back at him, I sized him up to be pleasant looking.

It's all Fred's fault for having sex with me so many times the last fortnight without allowing me to cum, that I was highly receptive to this molestation. In another situation, I might well have reported this man to the police. And Fred's fault for making me wear such provocative clothes so as to attract
Unwanted  attention.......

To be continued..